In elementary school my teachers would have us practice simple analogies with fill in the blanks. For example: “cat is to kitten as dog is to ________.”
 
Since that time I’ve built upon the foundation that was laid in Mrs. Nixon’s second grade classroom and become a decent analogist. I decided to get some use out of an otherwise useless skill by turning my analogy ability towards the sports world to come up with some simple sports analogies.
 
 
NBC is to Michael Phelps as FOX is to Tebow
 
Earlier this month during the broadcast of the BCS National Championship Game, FOX’s fawning over Tim Tebow reminded me of this summer when Michael Phelps was the apple of Dick Ebersol’s eye.
 
It seems every non-Gator college football fan is outraged at the tremendous amount of positive press Tebow is getting. In some ways it’s understandable. There are twenty-one other players on the field so why did Fox announcers Thom Brennaman and Charles Davis frustrate the knowledgeable football fan by telling us the same Tebow stories we’ve already heard.
 
But why is everyone so upset? Bob Costas, Marv Albert, and the rest of the NBA media celebrated Michael Jordan in the same way. Where was the public outcry when Jordan was being exalted by the media? Gatorade told us to “Be like Mike.” The same Mike that punched his teammates, visited casinos the night before playoff games, and was accused of adultery. 
 
Another part of the anti-Tebow movement that I don’t understand is people blaming Tebow for the coverage of Tebow. He doesn’t write and produce the college football pre and post game shows. If next season you find yourself suffering from Tebow overload, put the blame in the proper place. In addition, let’s at least appreciate the fact that Tebow is a positive role model, and the stories we have heard over and over are uplifting. 
 
Tim Tebow is to College Football as Darrell Hammond is to SNL
 
Tim Tebow is made for the college game and not the NFL. He’s a powerful college player but he has average strength by NFL standards. Tebow is an accurate passer at the college level where his receivers get plenty of separation but not accurate enough for the NFL where he’ll have to fit the ball in tighter windows. Tebow will have a place in the NFL but it will be in a nontraditional system. 
 
Darrell Hammond holds the record for most seasons as a Saturday Night Live cast member. He knows that being primarily an impressionist makes him ideal for SNL’s format of short comedic skits. Hammond doesn’t move on to doing movies like many former SNL cast members because nobody wants to see the same impression for an hour and a half. He’s an exceptional on SNL but wouldn’t be a success in movies. Just like Tebow is a phenomenal college quarterback but will be underwhelming in the NFL.
 
Tony Crocker is to Oklahoma Basketball as Stefan Welsh is to Arkansas Basketball
 
Crocker and Welsh are boom or bust players. Both capable of shooting the lights out and scoring 28 points or shooting 28% with 4 turnovers.
 
Robert Jarvis is to ORU Basketball as Master Chief is to Halo
 
Jarvis leads the Summit League in field goal attempts by a 29 shot margin. Obviously, Jarvis and Master Chief both have the same philosophy. “Shoot first and ask questions…maybe.”
 
Tulsa Offense is to College Basketball as Frank TV is to Sketch Comedy
 
The TU offense seems like they should be better than what they have been so far. Against ranked teams, Tulsa is averaging 47 points per game. They have a pure scorer in Ben Uzoh, a low post threat with Jerome Jordan, and two 40% three point shooters. On paper, TU has all the ingredients for a decent offense.
 
Frank TV seems like it should be funny. Frank Caliendo’s stand up is good and his impressions are amazingly accurate. But the show just isn’t funny.
 
Ultimately Frank TV and the TU offense both leave you feeling bored.
 
Sean Sutton coaching is to Sean Sutton not coaching as Mr. Hyde is to Dr. Jekyll
 
Last week during the OU vs. Texas basketball game the ESPN cameras found Sean Sutton in the crowd and he actually looked good. After last season as OSU’s coach he was always sweating through his suit, had his eyebrows at 45 degree angles, and looked like he was on the brink of passing out. It looks like life outside of coaching is treating him well.
 
I just hope he’s still doing well when he’s coaching the University of Tulsa Hurricane next season.
 
Lee Mayberry is to Booker T. Washington Girls Basketball as Alexander Baldwin is to Hollywood
 
I recently read a Tulsa World article about former Arkansas great and NBA first round pick Lee Mayberry and his oldest daughter Taleya Mayberry. Taleya Mayberry stars at Booker T. Washington High School in Tulsa, OK and next year she will be on scholarship to play basketball at the University of Tulsa.
 
What stuck out at me in this article is that Lee Mayberry has four other daughters that will presumably go to and play basketball at Booker T. If Taleya’s sisters can play anywhere close to the level she has been playing, then Booker T Girls basketball is set for the next decade.
 
Okay, so I concede that there might be a better comparison to Lee Mayberry’s basketball family than the patriarch of the Baldwin Brothers.
 
If you can think of a better version than any of the above analogies or have your own sports analogies to share feel free to leave a comment.

Dustin Talley can be reached at DTalley@oksportsreport.com